Dr. Fiendly exited the offices of the Bank of England on Montgomery Street, where he had just completed transferring some funds from his accounts in the Caymans. The events of the last few days had not been kind to his pocketbook.
He got into his silver Lincoln Towncar, again mourning the loss only two days prior of his prized Jaguar. Damn that Tai Anne Roper!
His cellphone chirped. He clicked on.
"Yes?"
"Guess what?" It was the Wenche. "Roper and Drew Thrasher just got their asses kidnapped! Right off the street in broad fuckin' daylight!"
"By who?"
"Well they didn't exactly leave their names, and I didn't have a ringside seat, but they were pros! Tranked'em both with pistols and loaded them into a van."
Fiendly started up the Lincoln and pulled into traffic. "Please tell me you're following them."
"Yuppers. Just turned south on Van Ness from Filbert. They got snatched in an alley as they were leaving La Folie on Polk."
Fiendly tried to imagine The City in his head as he blew through a red light and made a hard left onto Sutter with the tires squealing.
"Describe the van, Wenche."
"White shitbox Ford, mid-ninties, with Achmeed's and Abdul's Fine Auto Detailing on both sides. Cal tags 3-Sierra-Tango-4865."
"Have you been spotted?"
"Ha! Ye of little faith! I'm on the helmet hookup to my cell too."
"Alright, Wenche," Fiendly growled. "Don't lose them. We're going for an intercept."
"I thought that'd be in the cards!" The Wenche cackled. "But are you doing this for Dahling Drew or for Sweet Tai Anne?"
Fiendly shook his head as he heard her cackle over the phone. The Wenche!!!
***
Tai Anne Roper opened her eyes and found herself looking straight into Drew's big brown eyes.
They were together on a carpeted floor, in the far corner of the van, which seemed to be moving through heavy city traffic. Tai looked about and instantly regretted it as her tummy flip-flopped and she almost lost consciousness again.
She turned back to Drew. She tested and pulled at the plastic cord ties, but there was no give or mercy to them. They were as effective as the big sock that had been wadded up and secured in her mouth. At least it tasted clean.
A pothole caused them to shift, with Drew coming in tight next to her. Their outthrust breasts meshing together. Tai groaned in fear.
One of the men who had taken them was sitting at a console full of surveillance equipment, listening to
a police scanner. It didn't sound like anybody had seen their kidnapping.
Drew placed her right cheek again Tai's left cheek. Her warm skin and the feel of her breath over her face comforted Tai.
They were just two bound and gagged women, being taken to an unknown future by unknown kidnappers, drawing comfort from one other.
***
"Wenche, where are they now?" Fiendly asked.
"Still southbound Van Ness, approaching California. Traffic is for shit."
"Good thing it is. I should be able to intercept at Sutter," Fiendly said. "Once I get behind them, I want you to get in front of them and cause a little... comotion."
"Fiendly," The Wenche growled. "I know you aren't going to ask me to put down 19K worth of Italian racing bike in front of a POS Ford van!"
"I'll get you another one when we get home!" Fiendly replied. "Besides, you're well padded!"
"Har-de-har-har... passing Pine Street."
Fiendly sped up, passing Hyde. Three blocks to Van Ness. He topped the rise of Nob Hill too fast, causing the Lincoln to go airborne for a long moment just like in the movies. The tires chirped as they hit the pavement and he bottomed out the suspension.
He passed a clanging Muni trolley and prayed that a black and white wouldn't appear from a sidestreet.
Fiendly reached the intersection of Van Ness and Sutter on a stale red light, just as a white Ford van with Achmeed's & Abdul's Fine Auto Detailing! on the side passed, followed two cars later by The Wenche on her red Ducati 998 racing bike. Fiendly thought she looked mighty spiffy in her skintight red and black racing leathers and full face helmet.
Fiendly was able to pull in right behind her. "Alright, Wenche. Make it look good! And be careful."
"Yessir," even over the cell line, he could catch the fear in her voice. "I... I love you, Fiendly."
Before he could reply, she had goosed the throttle and roared into the next lane to pass in front of the Ford van. Then she cut in too close and put the motorcycle down right in front of the van's front wheels.
Abbas was driving, and despite his best efforts, the Ford ate the Italian racing bike under its front tires as the bike's rider hit the pavement and skittered about twenty feet before hitting the curb.
"Shit!" Abbas shouted. Gamal was in the passenger seat, already slipping an Uzi machinepistol under his leather jacket.
The van slewed to a messy halt, throwing sparks. It felt like the motorbike was wedged under the front wheels.
Pedestrians were already milling
about, trying to help The Wenche onto her feet. She hadn't been hurt, in fact she had already pulled off her helmet and was shouting at the driver of the van. "HEY MUTHAH-FUCK-AH!!! YOU JUST FUCKED UP MY NEW GODDAMNED DUCATI AND ALMOST FUCKIN' KILLED ME!!!"
She threw her helmet at the Ford's windshield, spiderwebbing the glass.
"What now?" Gamal asked.
"Play it by ear," Abbas said. "Tell Fahd to get ready to kill both the women. Otherwise we wait for Shahin to catch up."
Gamal nodded. Shahin and his brother were trailing two blocks behind in a Dodge SUV. With luck, they could quickly transfer over their captives and be gone before the police showed.
Abbas got out and looked at the damage. The motorbike had blown both front tires while a mix of coolant and transmission fluid was spewing out from under the front of the van.
Fiendly had pulled to a halt right behind the van and gotten out of his Lincoln, he came up behind Abbas carrying his black bag.
"Is anyone injured?" he said. "I am a Doc..."
He stopped as Abbas turned and the two men saw each other's faces.
"Fiendly?" Abbas whispered.
"I say!" Fiendly laughed. "Abbas! Fancy running into you here! It has been awhile... Tunisia '98, wasn't it?"
"Yes," Abbas said darkly.
The Wenche was now getting into a shouting match with Gamal. A large crowd of passersby had gathered and seemed to be taking the side of the pretty girl in tight leathers over the big swarthy Arab.
"I see you still have your whore with you," Abbas said.
"She comes in handy," Fiendly replied. "Tell me, dear boy, are the rest of your 'Fingers of Muhammad', or whatever you call your band of merry men, wandering about The City as well?"
"We are the Fist of Allah!" Abbas replied, barely containing his anger. "And yes, we are all very much here, as you are about to find out! Now, tell me what is the meaning of this bullshit."
"Well, its quite simple, boyo," Fiendly said. "I want you to give me the two kidnapped girls you have in the back of that van."
Abbas laughed. "And why should I do that?"
"Because the police will be here momentarily, and they don't take kindly to swarthy Arab types kidnapping pretty girls off their
streets."
Abbas took a step forward, getting right in Fiendly's face. "Don't press your luck, old man. If push comes to shove, We will shoot our way out. You want innocent blood on this street?"
"Doesn't matter to me one way or the other," Fiendly said matter-of-factly. "But you'd do well to remember that this is post 9/11 America. And a bunch of towelheads shooting up San Fran will bring down the very wraith of Jehovah. In fifteen minutes, every bridge, tunnel and road will be closed down and you and your boyos will be trapped like rats."
Abbas considered his options. The approaching warble of a police siren helped make up his mind.
"Go. Take the bitches."
"A pleasure doing business with you," Fiendly said. "Perhaps we'll meet again."
"I'm sure we will."
Fiendly went to the back doors of the van and tapped the glass. They were opened by a surly Fahd who had just gotten his orders from Abbas over his earmike.
""Hullo, Fahd!" Fiendly said, spotting Tai and Drew trussed up in the corner. "Drown any kittens lately?"
Fahd looked daggers at Fiendly and hopped out of the van. Fiendly got in and closed the doors behind him. He went to the two women and pulled his Sykes-Fairbourne SAS knife from his ankle sheath.
"Good afternoon, ladies," Fiendly said as his knife made short work of the plastic cord ties that held their gags and legs. He also cut their elbow ties, but kept the cord about their wrists intact.
A woozy Drew Thrasher spit out her gag. "Fiendly to the rescue! Scooby-dooby-do!"
Tai Anne Roper spit out her gag and giggled. "Hiya, Fiendly! I've fallen and I can't get up!" She giggled again.
"Ah, I see you two are still tranked up on giggle juice," Fiendly observed. "Now both of you listen up! I can get us out of this jackpot if you both behave yourselves! The blokes who took you two are rough sorts, and are more than willing to shoot their way out of a jam. Either of you two make a noise to the crowd out there, or to the coppers and a lot of innocents are going to die."
He didn't give either woman a chance to think it over. He simply took them by the arms and hustled them out of the van and walked them over to the rear door of the Lincoln. The crowd didn't seem to notice that both women had their hands behind their backs or that they both looked loopy.
He shut and locked the door. Drew and Tai leaned into each other. As Fiendly walked around to the driver's side The Wenche intercepted him.
"What the fuck am I supposed to do?" she asked.
"Wait for the police and make sure they take a very long time," Fiendly replied as he handed a set of keys to her. "I took these off Tai Anne, I'm sure one fits her motorbike back in that alley. Get it and get back to the hotel ASAP and make sure you aren't being followed."
"So I lose my Ducati for a Jap road rocket?" The Wenche whined.
"We'll discuss that later," Fiendly said. "And Wenche? You were magnificent!"
He kissed her and she blushed.
Fiendly got into the Lincoln and laid down on the horn to get the traffic and rubberneckers to move. He was finally able to pull out and ease down Van Ness just as an SFPD motorcycle cop pulled up to the van, where The Wenche was smirking as she stared down Abbas, Fahd and Gamal.
The black leathered motorcop got off the bike and took off her helmet, revealing a ponytailed mane of blonde hair.
"Awwwwrighty now," Officer G.K. Sweet said. "What's the story?"
***
"What are you going to do with us, Fiendly?" Drew asked, trying to stifle a yawn. Tai was fast asleep on her shoulder, snoring softly.
"You mean besides saving your pretty asses from the unspeakable tortures of a cadre of Arab terrorists?" Fiendly replied as he made a couple of quick turns that put him in the heart of the Western Addition District, one of the last ungentrified, tough-ass neighborhoods in San Fran.
He took out a 'magic wand' --an electronic scanning device that resembled a magician's tool-- and turned around in his seat to run it over both Drew and Tai. They were both hot. Which meant he was being followed.
He pulled into the of a parking lot of a Safeway store on O'Farrell and got out. He used the wand once more to track down two filament sized bugging devices planted on the two women. One was in Tai's hair, another had been placed on the back of Drew's neck.
Fiendly chuckled. He would have expected nothing less from Fahd the Panther.
He quickly folded the filaments inside a five dollar bill and approached a young black man who was leaving the Safeway with a bag of groceries as he was fumbling with his car keys.
"I say," Fiendly said to him, holding up the fiver. "Didn't you just drop this?"
***
Two blocks away in a blue Dodge Durango, the last two digits of the Fist of Allah --Shahin and his brother Haytham-- were waiting for the blips on their GPS tracking screen to move.
"Shouldn't we move in a little closer?" Haytham asked.
"Fool!" Shahin hissed. "Fiendly is a pro. If he spots a tail we'll never get those two back. Now shut up, I know what I'm doing."
"Okay, he's moving again."
Shahin nodded and took off, unknowingly following Roscoe Lee Turner back to his Momma's house for lunch.
***
From there on it was child's play, as Fiendly took a roundabout route back to the twin towers of the First Interstate Center, where the Mandarin Oriental Hotel took up the top eleven floors. Both Tai and Drew were asleep in the back seat, looking as cute as two leathered kittens.
One of the perks of the Mandarin Oriental was the reserved underground carpark. Fiendly drove down to the lowest level which was nearly deserted and parked near the elevators.
Now he still had to figure out how to get two unwilling captives past the video monitors in the garage and elevator, plus whoever he could pass in the hallway.
Fiendly got out of the driver's seat and opened the rear door, shifting over Drew to sit between the two women, who seemed to be finally coming out of their trank induced slumber.
He opened his black bag and took out what looked like for all the world to be two cellophane wrapped
marshmallows. Indeed, they were marshmallows, but of his own creation.
"Eat up, Drew," Fiendly said, jamming one into Ms. Thrasher's mouth. "You too, Tai Anne."
"Ummph!" Tai Anne chewed and tried to swallow, but the gooey confection just stayed on her tongue and expanded til it filled her mouth and held her jaws together in a viselike grip.
"MMMppph fmmmp hmmmm!" Tai looked over to see that Drew was shaking her head, now unable to speak past a loud hum.
"Now let's do something about those pretty eyes of yours!"
He took out two pairs of rather stylish wraparound sunglasses, placing one on Drew and the other on Tai. Both women discovered the lenses were blacked out and that the frames were sealed tight against their faces and hooked about their ears. They were both effectively blinded.
"Now before I plug your ears, I want you both to know that if either one of you makes any trouble on the way up to my lair, I will severely punish the other one," Fiendly said. "However, cooperate and I promise not to lay a hand on either of you as long as you two are my captives. Understood?"
Both Tai and Drew nodded and hummed.
"Good girls!" He quickly jammed a set of earplugs into Drew's ears, while Tai got a small Sony midi walkman clipped to her lapel and a pair of earbud headphones jammed into her ears.
Tai tried to scream as she realized she was listening to Barry Manilow. The Fiend!!!
Fiendly proceeded to lead the two women out of the car and to the express elevator.
Just then, a Mr. and Mrs. Roland Hargill --an elderly couple visiting San Fran from Mason City, Iowa-- exited the elevator and greeted the threesome as they got on.
The man seemed friendly enough, but the two girls in leather just ignored them both, just staring off into space while wearing their fancy sunglasses and chewing gum.
Mrs. Hargill shook her head. How rude! As far as she was concerned, what both those snotty young girls needed was a good hard spanking!
Not that there was even a chance in hell they would ever get one...
Chapter Twenty-Nine